Brain, shut up please.

Sometimes.... I need a real strong coffee to convince myself that that the thoughts i pen down aren't just bitter ramblings of a neurotic teenager. The coffee doesn't help, though i'm getting better at drinking it.

I think it's a pain.
Whats a pain?
This constant pretense. This unnecessary importance given to such insipid people. 

Who knew song writing could be fun?

Holding on to whats left
Your faith will carress you
Looking for something that just isn't there
Face up! Its time to fly away

We heard your prayer
We're waiting there

Into the bright light
With wings unfurled
Dreams unwind in
This brand new world

Taste the rapture
Time is blurred
Touch and capture
A brand new world

So is your purpose shaking?
Dont break down when your hope is lost
And looking for words to say
Discover the strength to find your way

I can see you wanting to believe
In something that is greater than you or me
And so you finally start to see
That you have the power in you to break free


Into the bright light
With wings unfurled
Dreams unwind in
This brand new world

Taste the rapture
Time is blurred
Touch and capture
A brand new world

first days.

hello.
i think sometimes i get lost in my world of preconceived notions and begin to behave, around people, in ways i wouldn't otherwise. i tell myself that i'm not judgemental, someone makes one wrong move, there is something inside that subtly breaks, and suddenly i'm doomed to an uncomfortable conversation filled with small talk and bad humor - or no talking at all. i understand that a mans reputation may not always precede him, that first impressions are overrated and that words whispered in bathrooms and corridors may only be words - unfortunately harsh ones at that. so why do i succumb to this biased version of myself? believing that your views are always hidden away safely inside of you would be making a mistake, especially since your attitude shapes your behavior...immediately or eventually. i wish i could be more comfortable with certain habits, and more care free around those who i can't relate to. i wish i could rid myself of all inhibitions and learn to embrace the different kinds of people who surround me today, or at least embrace whats good in each of them, for there is always good.

"Torn between two lovers feeling like a fool, loving both of you is breaking all the rules" (Mary MacGregor).

Burn

Why is it that every time you come into my life, you bring about such chaos?

You usurp my time, sneaking into the little cracks and corners of my mind, seeking to consume me completely. 

You're a destructive, ubiquitous force. A flame winded by yours truly until you break out into a fire that slowly burns my world until there's nothing left but a pile of ashes that once were, my hopes and dreams.
Why is it that every time you come into my life, you bring about such chaos?
It is only because I allow you to.

Pull me into your trap, before I know better, for I wish to be seduced by you.

People say that there is beauty in ultimate destruction...a celebration in loss!

Before you leave, remember to turn around and watch me burn.

If I turn into another...

We all have a weakness

But some of ours are easy to identify.

Look me in the eye

And ask for forgiveness;

We'll make a pact to never speak that word again

Yes you are my friend.

We all have something that digs at us,

At least we dig each other

So when weakness turns my ego up

I know you'll count on the me from yesterday

If I turn into another

Dig me up from under what is covering

The better part of me

Sing this song

Remind me that we'll always have each other

When everything else is gone.

We all have a sickness

That cleverly attaches and multiplies

No matter how we try.

We all have someone that digs at us,

At least we dig each other

So when sickness turns my ego up

I know you'll act as a clever medicine.

If I turn into another

Dig me up from under what is covering

The better part of me.

Sing this song!

Remind me that we'll always have each other

When everything else is gone.

Oh each other....

When everything

Else is gone.

Admiration

Could you move in slow motion?
Everything goes by so fast 
Just slow down a little 
Save the best part for last

You speak in riddles 
Your intentions turn me on 
I'm your's forever 
Will you love me when I'm gone?

The Last.

Hello, hello. (yes I sang that out.)

This is a farewell blogpost. Though it is kind of late, this site is dead now. I suppose I just had to finish it off.

I was a different person when I created this blog. After two years, now, I find I stand in a good place.
I wont write anymore, whatever I feel will remain personal. Stuck in my head forever. Infact, the only kind of way i'm going public is on stage. Hopefully in the one year that I've given myself I can go way up and finally reach my dream college - Juilliard.

That is all my life is going to be about now. I don't have a minute to waste.
And so if you see me performing anytime soon, you'll cheer me on I hope.

Thank you for reading and sharing my experiences as if they were your own, even though this blog was meant to be more of a diary, it was after all on the internet.
And most of all, thank you for being a part of my life.